I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
