Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize