Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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