When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
