I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
