Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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