If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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