My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Randomize
