I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
