god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
jump out the window naked night went bad
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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