Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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