They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize
