Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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