belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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