so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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