The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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