Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
