Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
