you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
