Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
