yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
