i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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