Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
