I must be too annoying 4 u.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
