Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
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