Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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