Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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