I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
