How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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