So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
