bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
