tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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