wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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