wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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