Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Randomize
