its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Randomize
