ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
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