Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Randomize
