Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
