oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
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