Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
