There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Randomize
