woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
