I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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