soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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