i jhust puked up my retainher.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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