how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Randomize
