Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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