you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
