I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
